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Kate, Kathrin, Katja
06 April 2014 @ 05:59 pm
Title: "C" as in "Cacotopia"
Chapters 3/26
Author: gazerock4eva
Pairing: Jonghyun x Onew
Genre: Romance, Fluff
Disclaimer: The boys belong to themselves, only the idea is mine.
Rating: PG-13
Note: This is a series of one-shots that aren't connected in terms of plot in any way and can be read separately from each other depending on your favorite pairings.
Summary: Cacotopia: an imaginary place or state in which the condition of life is extremely bad, as from deprivation, oppression, or terror; a work describing such a place or state. Decades before the first documented use of the word "dystopia" was "cacotopia", though dystopia became the more popular term, cacotopia finds occasional use.
Synopsis: He wanted to question the meaning of this but didn't get to do that either, because the brunette leaned in and brought his pretty mouth down onto his. There were two initial things he felt acutely and at once; the first being the incredible softness of the pliant lips pressed gingerly to his own pair, and the second was the electric tingle that sparked down his nerve tracts from the tenderness of the simple contact, making the sensation of it that much more... profound.

["A" as in "Anathema"] (ReitaxRuki)
["B" as in "Bias"] (UruhaxAoi)

'C' as in 'Cacotopia'Collapse )
Current Location: Bedroom
Current Mood: cheerfulcheerful
Current Music: SHINee - Better
Kate, Kathrin, Katja
29 March 2014 @ 11:07 pm
F-Lock: Most of my writing is f-locked. Sort of like a community of my own and access is members-only.

The main reason for that was that over the time, I have simply gotten uncomfortable with posting some of my writing publicly. It was less the 'I don't want to share it anymore' but more of the 'I don't want it out in the open anymore, and only want to share it with a particular audience' kind of sentiment. And while I was lying awake one night, the simplest of thoughts struck me. It might seem really silly to some people, but I lay there thinking about this and that reason until it occurred to me... Nobody is forcing me to post anything publicly in the first place.

That is why LJ has options for f-locked entries and private entries. If I want my writing to be public, I post it openly in my LJ and to communities and share it with everybody. If I want to share my writing with only a group of people, that's what f-lock and custom lock is for. If I want to post only for myself I set it to private and if I don't want to post my writing at all, I just don't post it. And there is no need to justify my choices about what I decide to share with whom to anybody; there is no need to make mountains out of molehills and there is no need for blowing this out of proportions and creating any unnecessary drama over it.

Yes, sometimes it's just that simple *laughs* Some of my writing, I will be posting publicly as I ever did. But some of my writing will be locked down now; you can think of it as some sort of my own little community and entry is members only. People who want in will join, people who don't will just keep reading the things that are open to everybody.

Part of the reason is that I don't want some of my writing that is more... personal to be out there in the open anymore, but another part of it is just that public blogging comes with a certain amount of pressure and different kinds of drawbacks - and in view of all the changes happening in my life and in my personality, I don't need any more exposure to that pressure and those drawbacks than I really want to. I'll still be writing one-shots and shorter stories for everybody to enjoy, so if you're not on my f-list and don't really care about my locked stories you will still be able to read what writing of mine is posted publicly and to communities. However if you want to read some of my more private pieces, you'd have to ask me to add you.

Please bear in mind that if you join and remain perpetually silent/inactive, your membership will eventually be revoked again after a couple of months when I go about checking through my f-list. So don't join unless you're certain that you'd want to take the time and make yourself known (ergo leave a comment) every once in a while, otherwise you can simply read and enjoy my publicly shared stuff.
Current Location: Bedroom
Current Mood: energeticenergetic
Current Music: 100% - Beat
Kate, Kathrin, Katja
20 March 2014 @ 12:20 am
Title: "B" as in "Bias"
Chapters 2/26
Author: gazerock4eva
Pairing: Uruha x Aoi
Genre: Romance, Fluff
Disclaimer: The boys belong to themselves, only the idea is mine.
Rating: PG-13
Note: This is a series of one-shots that aren't connected in terms of plot in any way and can be read separately from each other depending on your favorite pairings.
Summary: Bias: a preference or an inclination, especially one that inhibits impartial judgment; mental tendency or inclination, especially an irrational preference or prejudice.
Synopsis: Inclining his head a bit, as though he wanted to survey his band mate from a different angle, Aoi's lips twitched a placid smile: "You look confused."
Frankly, Uruha was. Also, he somehow had the feeling of being toyed with; not in a malicious or scornful manner, more like a gentle teasing. All the same, he didn't quite know how to react to it, so he just stood there looking at the other man and blinking in a bemused way.

["A" as in "Anathema"] (ReitaxRuki)

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Current Location: Bedroom
Current Mood: goodgood
Current Music: Speed - Don't Tease Me
Kate, Kathrin, Katja
14 January 2014 @ 05:06 pm
Title: "A" as in "Anathema"
Author: gazerock4eva
Pairing: Reita x Ruki
Genre: Drama, Romance
Disclaimer: The boys belong to themselves, only the idea is mine.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Anathema: a person or thing detested or loathed; a person or thing condemned to damnation; any imprecation of divine punishment; a curse, execration.
Synopsis: Still, some small part of him was actually... thankful. For the company, for not being alone. Days like these, he wanted company. Only he never sought it out because... Maybe he feared no one would understand. Maybe he didn't want anyone to. Or maybe he simply wanted only one to. He really didn't need many people to know everything about him, or to comprehend or to comfort. One would be enough. Just one...

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Current Location: Bedroom
Current Mood: pensivepensive
Current Music: Younha - Not There
Kate, Kathrin, Katja
12 December 2013 @ 12:36 am
Hiya, everybody!

I apologize for the slight delay in ADF updates, I know I said on Twitter it'll be out on Tuesday but real life decided to step in and mess with my plans. This time however in a positive way *laughs* Finally!

To be honest I've been having a rather shitty year thus far, particularly because after quitting university I had a very hard time finding an apprenticeship. It was very stressful and at times awfully depressing, and surely not easy but!

At last, life's being good to me. I got a call this morning from one of the companies I had applied to, and the wonderful lady on the phone informed me that I've been signed up! I'll be driving over there tomorrow to sign my contract and I'll be officially starting an apprenticeship as an industrial business management assistant (long job name, I know. Those of you who are German might be better acquainted with the term "Industriekauffrau" *laughs*) next year.

They had chosen a total of five apprentices out of 100 applicants, so you can see how stiff the competition is and how hard it actually is to get a good spot nowadays. The company is top notch though, and I had really, really, really wanted that spot. I've been on pins and needles basically the entire last week and have started to get progressively downhearted since yesterday because it was already Tuesday and I still hadn't heard anything from them.

But, it's all been worth it, today's call saved the year *laughs* I am so happy and relieved like you wouldn't believe. There's nothing worse than staring down an uncertain future, especially for young people such as myself.

As is, I will be starting August 2014 which is still eight months away, but given that I've tried and waited for almost two years, another 8 months are nothing. Life is finally starting to look up for me and I'm just feeling like a leaden weight just fell off my shoulders. I'm pumped and motivated and I can't wait for next year! *laughs* It will be so good to finally start work and school and just move forward with my life again. It's been in stagnation for too long and that had started to really get to me.

So for all of you who are still in between things, or don't yet know what to do with their lives or are trying to establish foothold in life like I have been only a day ago, hang in there! If you don't give up and keep trying, you will be rewarded - trust me on that. Heaven knows I've been through enough bullshit and dark times in my life where all I wanted was to just curl up and die or give up on all and everything but so long as you keep picking yourself up and keep pushing yourself forward, good things will come to you.

It's not fate, or destiny or gods or whatever else. Don't rely on those to bring you happiness and don't blame those for the bad things in your life. It's all about you, and your effort and your strength and your dedication to whatever it is you've set your mind on. It won't fall into your lap easily most of the time but if you want happiness for yourself and chase after it, you'll get it.

I know it sounds cliché, but really the most important thing is to not give up. Even if you feel like it, the trick that helped me through the most sinister patches of my life was the pure will to make it just another day. You may never know what tomorrow will be like and when you feel like throwing everything away, just push yourself for one more day. And the next day, for another day more, and the next and the next, one day at a time. Keep pushing and eventually, you will get stronger and things will get easier, and life will get better.

And if you feel like you're alone and don't really have anyone to support you; I know it's not much but know that I do. If you're struggling with those things, I support you wholeheartedly and I'm cheering you on, whoever you are and wherever you are because believe me, I know what it's like. Been there, done that and came out alive.

Life can be an awful, awful creature at times but really, the good things that you manage to seize in it are all worth it. Be that good thing a job/apprenticeship, or a relationship, or family and friends. Because frankly, right this moment, I am SO happy I haven't given up whenever I've been close to doing it, and one day you'll be happy about it as well, if you aren't already *laughs* So for all of you who are currently perfectly content with your lives, keep doing what you do!

Anyway, strayed off topic here XD I'll be going off to bed now and looking forward to tomorrow and signing my contract very much and I promise I'll get the next chapter out latest this weekend. I just really had my head and heart filled with a lot of other things and I haven't been able to focus on writing much the past days. I had such a good feeling after the interview and I wanted to be part of that company so badly, I was really scared to receive a rejection. I slept bad and I ate little and basically waited day in day out on that call which had finally come today and I'm just very happy. Mentally exhausted and drained, but happy *laughs*

I'll likely get to replying all the messages and comments on the weekend as well, so I will be seeing you guys around soon. Stay strong and motivated; live life, it's worth it!

Much love and lots of hugs to all of you <3!
Current Location: Bedroom
Current Mood: happyhappy
Current Music: N-Sonic - Run & Run
Kate, Kathrin, Katja
02 November 2013 @ 03:11 am
Well, you never know how something is going to work until you try it.

So I was continuing with the rewriting of SotF yesterday and after finishing Chapter 3 as well as with the comments I have received on the revised version so far in mind, I dived into writing Chapter 4 to verify something for myself and then I stopped midway through it.

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All this said, have fun reading no matter if you're new to both these stories or have already read them before, and feel free to leave comments on all and any chapter whenever you feel like it - feedback is always much appreciated.

Ah, look at how the time flies. I've started on all this reorganizing thing around 10PM and now it's closing in on 3AM and I think I'm definitely getting sleepy *laughs* Either way, I have taken the rewritten Chapters down to avoid confusion, but everybody who's commented on those two posts will find a message with a reply in their inbox after I wake up tomorrow regardless. I also still have a few personal messages I yet didn't get to reply to, but rest assured I'll do so soon!

Thank you for your patience and your loyalty to everybody who's followed me and my writing all the way from my old LJ to this new one. I'm deeply honored and grateful to have such supportive, faithful friends and readers at my side. Here's to hoping that we can finish "A Demon's Fate" eventually - together.

Much love and many warm hugs to all of you <3!

PS: Sorry for the confusion. It occurred to me only as I was ready to crawl into bed - I linked all the entries, but I totally forgot to remove the privacy lock *facepalms* Like said, I was sleepy *laughs* So I got back on my computer real quick here, and it should all be fixed now! If you happen to come across any other non-accessible entries still, please do inform me! *drops into bed*
Current Location: Bedroom
Current Mood: sleepysleepy
Current Music: Beast - Thriller
Kate, Kathrin, Katja
29 October 2013 @ 02:16 pm
Hi guys!

Well, long time no see I guess. First off, sorry for my abrupt disappearance, and such a long one, too. I took what you could say a forced hiatus which I really didn't intend to take especially so shortly after coming back to LJ.

Well, to make a long story short and cut to the chase. The past four months I was really sick and had to put all my energy into struggling to get better, so most of the days I didn't have much time or strength for anything else. It just caught me off guard and smacked me right out of every possible routine; it was like every day I was so exhausted, I barely had any energy left to even think straight. I let many things slide from school over work to family and friends, let alone writing. The days passed by so quickly, weeks to months and before I realized it, it's been so long since I've written anything here again.

Sadly, due to all that was going on, I also didn't get to see Gazette's live in Munich which was quite an additional upset. But well... in the end I dealt with it like I do with most of the upsetting stuff that happens in my life.

More details under the cutCollapse )

Bottom line of all this are good news; I'm doing much better by now. I know I've let myself go a lot, in my real life as well as my virtual presence and I've been trying to fix things step by step starting from my immediate surroundings of course since my health, family and school and work did have priority. But finally my reach has also extended to my online activities and hopefully I'll be able to keep everything stable both in real life and online for a while now.

Thus as a bonus and an apology for such a relatively long absence, I bring you quite a few things to read in order to commence the end of my longish hiatus and my revived writer's resolve with a small literary bang - I have a new chapter of "Unspoken" fresh out of press as well as two whole chapters of SotF revised! I think it took me two to three weeks to finish the bunch of it, and then another week to finally decide on posting it all up *laughs* I don't know why I always get so nervous before posting, probably because I'm always anxious about what people will think and say but either way, it's here! I will try to go back to my "an update a week" routine but I'm making no promises and no commitments just yet.

I hope you'll enjoy the read and forgive me my sudden MIA moment, I apologize to anybody who's been worried or angered by it. Sometimes life just has a cruel sense of humor when it comes and kicks you out of balance like that, leaving you scrambling around trying to get back up onto your feet again.

So, here're the links:

[Unspoken, Chapter 6]
[SotF, Chapter 1]
[SotF, Chapter 2]

Oh and also, Kate has finally decided to go with the time. I'm not a big fan of those social network sites like Facebook and tumblr and so on, but I did make a twitter account! I will likely be tweeting mostly about my fictions there so if you feel like it, you can add/follow me on Twitter!

Here's the link: https://twitter.com/gazerock4eva

*lots of hugs and love to all of you* <3!
Current Location: Bedroom
Current Mood: nervousnervous
Current Music: Cassis - Stand Up